La Zona Muerta

Continental Classic episodes of Dynamite tend to be a bit harder to write about; I have some thoughts about yesterday’s show (mostly positive, obviously; it was a good show and the time went by very quickly) but there’s not a lot to drill into without boring blow by blow move recaps… that’s not really what I do and, presumably, not really what you’re here for.

This is a REALLY good time of year for the ol’ AY EE DUB; they’re forced to knuckle down a little bit and present mostly in ring concerns… everything is a little more focussed, more uni-directional. Even the promos and such really basically have to serve the Classic or the main title programs / main feuds… there’s not a lot of time for horseshit. Everything has to kind of drive forward.

I KNOW there are people mad (still) about Samoa Joe as champion. I KNOW there are people still mad about HOOK being a catalyst (up to and including Hangman Adam Page, apparently) for same… but it’s like… all right… you go over there and be mad… let me enjoy Joe and Eddie Kingston promoing on each other. And these promos were good; I’m not a big fan of the show opening promo (neither is my relatable king Eddie Kingston; he just wanted to do the promo and go back to his hotel; presumably to go watch All Japan clips on his phone in bed) as a show kick off but as far as motivation, mannerism and promo ability goes? THIS SHIT RULED. Joe rules (sorry, angry mob). Eddie rules. They have a good reason to be pissed at each other. They have a good reason to be fighting… and that’s all I really want out of my sweaty grapple boy time; an issue and the means to have it solved in ring. “If you don’t bring the OLD Samoa Joe… I’m gonna eat you ALIVE,” Eddie thundered at an incredulous Joe. THIS IS POD RACING OR WHATEVER. Is that gonna be a killer match…? I think it will be fine; both guys can hide their limitations with brawling, both guys have the means to make the brawling look REAL. Should be good, or at least good enough. I opined last week that Eddie is obviously there to eat a pin… I was talking to a buddy who questioned the fact I thought it to be obvious… and I see a LOT of folks that think a quick feel good Eddie title win is not outside of the realm of possibility. I dunno. I wouldn’t be AGAINST it… but the reality would be that if Eddie were to win it, he’d be dropping it IMMEDIATELY to an apparently returning MJF in January. I think EVERYONE would be pissed off by that, y’know? Up to and including ME. We shall see.

The CC matches on this episode all delivered, full stop. I can NOT credibly listen to anyone complain about a youth problem in AEW when dudes like Kevin Knight and Kyle Fletcher are there, letting it all hang out. The cool thing about Kevin Knight being in a tourney like this? He’s going to absorb knowledge like a thirsty sponge. Apparently Darby Allin was HOSPITALIZED SHOOTWAY after his incredibly giving match with Knight last week and there is a question as to whether he can continue on. I hope that’s a bit of a wake up call for the guy that he doesn’t have to jeopardize his spine every week (it won’t be, but one lives in hope). Nothing really much to say here other than Kyle Fletcher / Kevin Knight was PROBABLY my match of the night, but that’s a tough call because I also really enjoyed extra surly Kazuchika Okada versus super grimy catch man PAC. That Okada / Pac match was so good and ended on a fluke cradle reversal pin… I know that’s the kind of finish that grates, that grinds some people’s gears, but I find it credible enough. Maybe the opponent is thinking too far ahead or worse, thinking the battle is done, whoops, leverage change, 1, 2, 3. Works for me… even the best can be caught with their metaphorical pants down. Circling back to Knight / Fletcher… man, MAN, did that have an incredible closing stretch… Knight hit that effortless coast to coast kick… Fletcher survived… and got Knight on the UFO splash attempt with the ol’ knees up, Gs up. They fought over the deadly brainbuster spot, Fletch nailed Knight with a kick and finally got the brainbuster FTW. I WAS HOOTIN’ AND HOLLERIN’. THIS IS REALLY ALL I WANT OUT OF WRESTLING.

One other promo segment is probably worth a flag up before I speak of the main event… patron saint of La Zona Muerta, Mr. Don Callis, cut a promo on all the people bitching about the International / Continental Title situation… including (not just including; it felt almost personally addressed to) a prominent broadcaster I may have once been strongly affiliated with.

OH, HOW I LAUGHED. Don should add “mirth maker” to his list of plaudits and accomplishments. Did you know he once forgave someone for committing MURDER? Would that we ALL had that level of forgiveness in our hearts. Don did call out the Young Bucks earlier in the show (AND WET A FINGER IN ORDER TO DO A MORE EFFICIENT FISH HOOK EYE GOUGE to Matt Jackson) but the day was ultimately saved by the Jurassic Dudes (booooo) and big X-MAS Kenny Omega (yayyyy). I don’t really want face Bucks, as I’ve opined endlessly, but them teaming with Kenny against Don’s evil grapple men will be fun.

Your main event of the evening was Jon Moxley versus Claudio Castagnoli. Claudio… uh… beat Mox, clean as a sheet. Just BOOM, running uppercut and a pin. Later, after the show, Mox did DEATH RIDER PENANCE by doing push ups and Claudio, Wheeler YUTA and Marina Shafir joined him in push up solidarity.

So, like, are they doing the Death Rider split everyone from hell to breakfast has fantasy booked as definitely for sure happening?

I have no idea. I’m starting to lean towards “no.” Actually, I’ve never really been on board that train… there are definitely clues you could interpret as leading towards that conclusion. However, there seems to be as much evidence pointing to them all being alpha male (sorry, Marina… Ms. Shafir if you’re nasty) gym bro masochism weirdos who make each other do squats and burpees until they pass out.

So… tl;dr. Good Dynamite; great in ring action. Good story movement. 8 out of 10, would light the fuse again. There was still terminal dumbness… bad crowd micing all night, Renee Paquette saying that she “got to speak to Jon Moxley earlier” (Jesus, I should hope so… they really shouldn’t have Renee interact with Mox at all)… the mistake of putting the kind of awkward Kris Statlander right next to the charisma laden Jamie Hayter… the return of the who could possibly care Dynamite Diamond Ring (and MJF, one supposes)… little things… but that’s kind of the AEW way at this point. I’m choosing to concentrate on the stuff that gets ME going, and the way you spell that is C-O-N-T-I-N-E-N-T-A-L C-L-A-S-S-I-C.